Job--less . . . Fear--less: the future is my own.

I've been out of a job for longer than I expected.

What I have more time for -and more time than I desire for- is homework. But I haven't been doing homework every waking moment.
I'm using this time to find out what my desires are and finding out what happens when the sun doesn't want to shine and I feel like somewhat running out of time.
Point blank: it's a rollercoaster ride, but I'm not just sitting on my couch waiting for something to just 'fall into my lap.'
Nowadays, I'm taking control over my next destiny and I have the opportunity to take all the time in the world to find out what opportunities are out there. Just read an article by Glamour [http://www.glamour.com/] and take a look at who is on the front cover. I read this and I like it. Gave me another piece of motivation.
Right now, I'm standing up for me, even when everything is seems to be falling apart.

The life I lead isn't stressful, it's uneasy, but I have all the control in the world as to where I want to make my next move.
I know what I want and who I am: I care about people and listen to what they want, I may not always have the words I'm looking for when I need them, and your dang right I stumble, but I am picky about detail and notice the little things and then speak on them. I'm strong-willed, sometimes carefree.

Here's another thought: If the bills are being paid, I can take my vacations and still enjoy my time with family and friends and then have some left over for whatever, that's what I'm looking for. Comfort. Not a huge paycheck. I wouldn't know what to do with $1 million.
I do know what I'd do though if I won the lottery. As I mentioned before, I'm a care-giver. I'd pay off my debt, my families and a few others. I'd also buy my parents their dream retirement home, invest, buy a few cars that I'm interested in and then I'd continue working. And heck yes, I would donate a big portion of it to charity.

If you don't think you quite get who I am by now, then I don't know what you're not getting. Especially if you've kept up with the pieces I'm writing.