Friday, January 16, 2009

Miss Manners "and guest"

I read this article -below- on http://www.msn.com/ and posted it on my Facebook.

I had one person comment, so I followed up with their comment. Then someone else commented and once again, I decided to comment on their comment!

Then, I figured 'maybe this would be a great topic to start blogging about,' so here I am. I gave my URL http://www.springtoanything.blogspot.com/ this title because I want this to be any 'anything goes' kind of deal.

I'll literally be 'springing to anything' on here, myself, and feel that I may have just done something that will lead to . . . well, I'm not sure. But, I'm willing to give this a chance to see what happens!

Here's the article I was discussing with my friends:
Dear Miss Manners,
I have noticed lately, that amongst women of the same age group as myself who are engaged and planning large, expensive weddings, that my single friends are invited to said weddings without "and guest" added to their invitations.
It is almost as if the engaged women, in an attempt to keep cost down, have decided that the single women, whether they are dating someone or not, do not get the option to bring someone along to the wedding and reception.
Is this rude? I feel that just because these women are not married or engaged, they still should have the opportunity to bring a date to the wedding and that by assuming their dates just aren't as important if not legally bound by law, the engaged woman is being presumptuous and rude. What are your thoughts?


Gentle Reader,

That the invitation is to a wedding, not to an evening out on the town, and it is not rude not to be married in front of strangers who mean nothing to them and not much to you. If you must scour up a date, Miss Manners suggests looking over the single gentlemen at the wedding, who would not have been asked to bring along "and guest" either.


I know that I will want to be surrounded by only friends/family who I know well enough to the point where I'm not racking my brain making the guest list. Everyone is different though.

Also, a friend of mine, whose wedding I went to with a date - he also knew the couple and he was invited, we didn't know anyone and ended up leaving shortly after the reception began. We made sure to congratulate our friend (we both worked with her) and her husband (who was a customer at our work -Kwik Trip).

If you know that the friend of yours who is getting married, perhaps there's someone at the wedding they've invited who they can be sure to take a minute and introduce you to them at say, the wedding rehearsal. This is what happened to me at a wedding. I was good friends with the bride, dateless, but I was her wedding singer. You bet I was checking out the grooms men since my friend [the bride] told me that she wanted to introduce me to one of them. Funny part is, at the rehearsal, I remember I was scanning the guys and happened to pick out the exact guy she would introduce me to in an hour. We had fun at the wedding and went our separate ways. I have not seen or talked to him since.

Here's the deal though: not everybody will go the to reception and that's a smart move if you're alone, but if you're a chatter bug and extroverted, and are up for it, you'll find a way to keep yourself at the reception and enjoy the night. Essentially, you have been invited to a wedding to support the couple and witness something that is a very sacred moment your friend(s) life. You'll take the time to enjoy yourself and the moment. The couple wants you to enjoy their night, so do yourself a favor and get out there. You never know who you could possibly meet.

2 comments:

  1. I hate being alone at parties..and I'm sort of an extrovert, in an introvert-ish kind of way.

    I'd go to the wedding, wish my friend well, and skip the reception etc. all together. Less cost for her, less awkwardness for me!

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